The scarecrow and the birds

The half-fallen hat perches on the edge.

Is this the short straw?

Give the scarecrow a chance at scaring away the birds.

But the birds never returned.


Playground Crimes

Seems to me that the essence of candid memories has blown over.

You see the articles start to flood in. Another day of playground games. Don’t they realise that we don’t want to play?

All this time, and yet, more crimes.

Each time, the social media bursts like another balloon. Each pop is more than meets the eye.

All this time, and yet, more crimes.

I want to scrub the dirt from the toilet seat. This sh*t shouldn’t be going on. Mother Theresa and Mandela cry.

All this time, and yet, more crimes.

Lets write another twitter post in hope that it’ll go away. Even the big dogs are jumping on the bandwagon.

All this time, and yet, more crimes.

Billions of money floating around in the wrong hands – hardly surprising that the swarms nest has no back up plan.

All this time, still more crimes.

The clock fastens but the big dogs are at their desks or start another speech. I’m all for words, but the bullsh*t is tiring me out.

All this time, still more crimes.

Can’t they just look us in the eye and mean it when they say they have everything under control?

All this time, still more crimes.

I swear the hulahoop will stop spinning one day. Landing in the middle of the playground. What then?

All this time, still more crimes.

I press the red button on my remote, and we all carry on in our lives, without truly being listened to. The world frowns and the oceans swim.

in bed, frog/man voice and groggy cold… let’s say, “it ain’t attractive”

Hi guys!

Haven’t been around for a while! (Due to family illnesses/life changes/job searching/being a short arse Brit taking each day as it comes – hope you don’t mind!).

This post… well, it wasn’t planned – but that’s why it’ll probably make you laugh. Nothing to do with poetry. Do you know what? I’m literally – yes, literally – in bed right now. I still have my slippers on, who does that? They need to come off or else my feet will turn into two fireballs (two small fireballs, too).

I’m doing the classic “I’m ill” post. Yeah, lame. I know. But I’m not even “ill ill”. I categorise “ill” and “ill ill”. When someone’s ill/sick, then it’s because they have common stuff – cough, cold, flu etc. But ill ill means you’re beyond ill.

I currently have a headcold. Yep. A cold inside a head. I never understood it before but it’s like having a big amount of GUNGE trapped inside your nasals. Yeah, not attractive. It’s a good job I’m not taking a selfie in this darkness as it’d probably be the sequel to the film Halloween. (Just in time for Halloween as well – in cinemas soon!!).

I had a conversation earlier with someone who does not take a drink upstairs to bed with them. I was just thinking “HOW CAN YOU NOT WANT A DRINK OR FAILING THAT, EVEN A SIP OF WATER AT NIGHT?”. We debated it. But I realised that I probably need a drink at night because when I wake up, I usually get a dry mouth from sleeping with my mouth open – (lovely) – or at least I assume this happens. I suppose I look like the shocked emoji but in sleep mode. (So nobody better put any peas in my mouth or else!)

Who else sleeps on TOP of their bed, too?

I don’t know about you but I sometimes like to. With a blanket on. Defeats the purpose really but then again, quirky one = me. But after a few mins of deciding that it’s going to be cold sleeping on top of my bed, I decide to clamber under the duvet.

Also. I sleep with two pillows but one of my friends sleeps with theee. Isn’t three a crowd? With two pillows my neck is comfortable but with three I’m sure it’d be stretching my neck out to giraffe lengths! Imagine the neck ache in the morning. On the plus side, you’re one pillow closer to sitting upright whilst you wake up.

Also, we all do one sit-up per day. We all don’t recognise this. But when we wake up, we do a complete sit up to get out of bed. That’s 365 sit ups a year. Without even knowing. (Although, now you know)

I’m rambling. As us Brits would say, “talking bollocks” or “talking a load of shit” but you know…Someone has to do it, I guess?

Hope this post makes you smile – even a quarter of a smile, or a smirk – I’ll take that. Or a laugh, Either is cool. But I hope it makes you think that their are quirky people in this world with their own traits – even if it’s sleeping or a commentary from their bed!

I’m now going to sleep off this cough. Oh by the way, had a coughing fit on the phone to my auntie earlier SO MUCH that I couldn’t even say “I’m having a coughing fit!” On the phone so put the phone down – she thought I was choking – called back to check if I was ok, I answered,  I couldn’t answer in words so just coughed in hope that she’d understand that I had been talking so fast that my tongue had malfunctioned between laughing and talking to her that I literally could not stop coughing – yep, embarrassing and highly do not recommend it. I’ve been making sure that I’m talking slower since so that it doesn’t happen again!

Happens to us all.

Anyway, back to saying goodnight.

Again, this is not one of my normal posts – this is kinda like a note within a diary. Take it as you will.

Lots of love, (my fireball feet are now thanking me for allowing them air!)

Zoe. X

Paws of a Lioness

Her paws. The palms bounced

to and fro on the climbing rocks,

Claws intact, slightly overgrown

and worn. Senior years, I’d assume

But what defines age? Her eyes

had a spritz of youth sprayed into

the marble spheres. She saw me.

I stared back. My eyes had creases

at the sides. Hypocrisy pinged the

moment for that second, and I

knew that she’d see me as the

steak of all desires – a feast to

herself – who could blame her?

She’s an animal.

I saw the enclosure cage her wild

instinct. She once screamed to be

free, but now, she lost the fight

within her roaring soul to even

think about running on African


And as beautiful as she was, and

as grateful as I was to see such a

glorious creature, this was not the

chosen way of seeing her, like this,

Because it was not the life she chose for her and her feline paws.


Sometimes I talk to myself and hear the raindrops

crash onto the wavering steps; my feet cannot cross the bay

of last can-opened beginnings, prised open with eyes

like Siberian huskies, pulling the sleigh of daffodils to the

forefront of frost. As soon as my hands touch the cold

gems, the flakes disappear, and like that – life is there, for a moment.

Blog: Busy bees need their sleep, too… you know?

Hi guys!

This will be a very quick and brief blog post but I’m hoping to write a bigger one sometime very soon to update you all!

I’m currently writing this on my iPhone so if the blog turns out in a scattered mess, that’ll be why!

How are you all doing?

The past few weeks have been busy and crazy for me. I finally graduated last Friday!! I still can’t believe that little ol’ me got an English degree! I’ll write more about it in my next blog post. Hoping to do it either later on today or tomorrow when I’m not falling asleep (because then I’d just ramble like this and forget to finish my sentences so it would end up talking about giraffes and suddenly the


-blog post finishes as I enter the land of nod without telling you guys the juicy gossip!-


Anywat, please do comment and let me know what you’ve been up to, whether it be with writing or in general life!



Zoe. X


Hi guys!

I’m sorry that I have not been keeping up to speed on my blog over the past couple of months. I was so consumed with revising all different types of literature along with having the monumental task of writing my dissertation – I didn’t have much time on my hands for anything else!

In fact, most of my evenings were spent in front of my laptop as I typed away endless sentences in the kitchen. I cannot tell you the relief I felt when I handed in my dissertation at the end of April. I had my last exam a couple of weeks ago and it’s fair to say that when the exam had finished, I was out of that room faster than Usain Bolt(Olympics 2020 here I come!).

Since then, I had to catch up on sleep. To some, sleep is the norm but for me, I ended up resorting to getting a few hours sleep all night and my body had accustomed to it (I don’t recommend this). I feel a bit more refreshed and revitalised! (Makes it sound like one of those beauty adverts that advertise moisturisers on the tv!).

Although, you’re probably wondering if the hard work paid off.

*cue drumroll*

*bites nails*

*scratches head*

*drumroll keeps playing and by this point, everyone has lost attention on what they were originally waiting to hear the result of*

*kicks drum away*

Ok, so enough of that. I’m pleased to tell you all that I achieved a 2.1 in my dissertation! This is an upper second class classification and if you’re not from the UK, I’m not sure what the equivalent is in other countries – but hey, that’s what Google is for, right? Search away!

Last year, I was so upset with my second year grades that I had achieved a high 2.2 overall with all of my grades combined together. The thought of quitting crossed my mind but I had already completed one year so thought “what will be, will be” – especially if I worked my arse off in the final year – WHICH I DID, LET ME TELL YOU. My arse has been worked off so much that it’s now flat as a pancake, I kid you not. (Nah, just kidding, it’s still there – but metaphorically, I did work my arse off).

In my final year, I have achieved 2.1’s in every assignment including my dissertation. 2.1’s of all variations – even high 2.1’s – nearly firsts! I have never been so proud of myself. I made my final year about me – I cut out all dating episodes (guys), exercised, and focused on myself for once so that I could look back and say “Either way, however this degree ends up being classed as, I gave it my bloody best shot!”

To even achieve a 2.1 in my dissertation (which was written about Shakespearean villains) is such an achievement in itself. So… UNIVERSITY IS OVER! I graduate in July so I’ll keep you updated. I’ve been having some weird dreams about it – dreading walking across the stage in front of all the gawking eyes. I’m sure I’ll fall over. I’m hoping I won’t but I’ll have to try walking in my heels before the date arises as I tend to walk like Bambi when I wear heels – my legs go all over the place. It’s like I’ve had one too many to drink when really it’s my lack of balance!

Since then, I’ve also been having driving refresher lessons. I passed my test previously but I’m now having some extra lessons to boost my confidence and get me back on the road (as I will be buying my very own car shortly! – It’s all happening!). It was very weird, though. Everything that I had learnt previously automatically came back to me – even my driving instructor was surprised at my memory! (I surprised myself as usually my memory is like a goldfish, in particular, Dory from Finding Nemo!)

How are you all doing? Keep me updated on what I’ve missed!

Until next time,

Zoe. X